you are hoping he washes his ass in the shower because you are painfully aware that he’s going to demand that you eat it/ waiting, always waiting/ it makes no sense because they’re all on the clock anyway/ making you wait is going to cost them, but you’ve never been so highly aware of how it works (it either works or it doesn’t) that you can even understand it’s about power the whole dog and pony show is about having some strange and twisted power over you, and it’s definitely financial/ tricks usually pay in cash only, sex work is a cash economy even if some people do use credit cards, but a lot of tricks only want to deal with cash because it’s hard to trace/ you hated cheap motels but there it was/ often, you just concentrated on the sounds of the truck traffic just outside the room/ in the silence of the loneliness of hallways, nothing was ever done, nothing was ever really finished/ this particular trick had driven you way up the Interstate, and it was beginning to make you nervous/ it wasn’t like you exactly owned a car, what if he left you there tricks do this all the time/ they often want to punish you when the sex was over/ you wished the whole thing could be about cocksucking, meaning he would suck your cock, and you could split, and while that is about 80% of the prostitution gig, there is that other 20% you employed your antennae to watch for/ never ever allow a trick to tie you up/ tricks into shit liked watching the whore vomit, this was extra pricey/ only junkies ate shit and threw it up/ junkies want to get high/ not fucked/ junkies are not focused on getting off/ not without the money and the drugs or both/ you were wary of guns, but you also knew that whatever you might be wary of mattered to whom — no one/ you are alone and undone/ magnetized by neutrinos/ you hear the shower turn off/ the smell of towels, hair, and motel soap/ you wish you could get this over with/

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