I am a communist. That alone will push me down a thousand paths. I do not tell people about it. They laugh at me. Everyone hates me. I have learned that without support, you become autism’s slave. I like the phone because I can arrange the apps around how they fit into patterns I see patterns. Texting is too fast. It makes me throw phones I like the phone because I don’t have to look at you. Email only. I take three days to get back to you. You probably hate me because everyone does the whole world hates me. I self medicate. To throw my brain away. I look at noses. It gives the impression I agree with you and I am listening. I am in horrible agony all the time. I hate my life. Do normals. I might seem passive to you. But I’m flying. I have just developed ways to manipulate. Do not tell me what to write. My first book was given the kindness to be named a most Notable Book by this publication. It was written in a freezing cold roomI cannot write if I am by any window. I sleep on the floor. I can do two things. Not a hundred. Not three things. But two. I write better than I talk. I use a tiny camera with NASA’S version of a spy lens. Shape is like a match-box and people have no idea what I am talking about. I drive a dirt bike. Nothing encloses me. I ride it in the snow to know I am real. So I slap my face. My eyes will bleed. I do not see trouble coming. I am sorry. It is always like this. I go mute for days. I live inside my phone. Why let anyone in. I like it on my own terms.