Tim Barrus Blog
Posts tagged with relationships
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orphaned by the tide
in some place of sun/ the light spills dancing on your work/ the quick day is just an accent of bones and dust/ even the word work is more drainage than sweat but sweat, too/ i need room to think/ i need equivalent deserts of the sky in pain/ ripped…
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pretty pictures of you
the hunger for voyages was in his face https://tim-barrus.format.com/tim-barrus/238927-i-opened-my-eyes
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WhoWillLoveYou
WeCanOnlyAffordAMotelRoomfor1. SneakingIn. AFewExtrasNoLoudMusicNoJumpingOnBeds. IAskU:AtTheEndOfAllYourMomentsAtTheEndOfAllYourSorrowsAtTheEndOfAllYourLives. WhoWillLoveYou. WhoWillFight. WhoWillLoveYou. YouSayNoOneLovesYou. ThenWhatTheFuckAmI.
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That Boat Has Left the Dock
i bought a boat from old man hughes for five bucks/ it was really only worth three/ the boat leaks/ i can’t afford to fix it but who wants a boat anyway/ i do/ i take the boat out to the middle of the lake and sit there with a…
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drinking with the dog
u sitting on the bed again/ explaining yourself 2 me/ u looking downcast/ u unable to meet my gaze/ and this secret life u live is supposed to be unknown 2me/ please/ i have known u since the age of the dinosaurs/ like i give a flying fuck/ but i…
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like ships
there is just no possible fucking way that someone at some point is not going to feel left out/ i never did allow that to bother me/ something that pours from him, stealing moments we all are thieves, in a cataract of tenderness and cruelty upon some weak, plastic life…
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you carried him
you have carried him on your back through oceans of your sweat for a long while, now/ we both knew it was only a matter of time/ the big old boogeyman, time/ before you’d push back/ hard/ that way you push back when you push back/ it is always a…
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smoke and mirrors
the smoke he makes is obvious/ the mirrors in his pocket are less than obvious/ there are people who think he’s a magician/ he does have his tricks, but they’re play for pay, and they usually fall for his i am so into you game of reflective, thin ceramic masks/…
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Tent
in the morning they always have to pee somewhere mainly on a tree/ crawling out like rabbits from a magician’s hat/ izaak, randy, josh, and devon plus the rest of them like pilgrims for the whole marvelous and unvisited earth that blinds them in the aerial buoyancy of their raw-boned…
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When Everyone Else Has Washed Their Hands Of Him
He doesn’t really look at me in the eye. He seems quite bored. What does it mean. It means he’s scared to death. Attitude is only attitude. “Gotta light.” I always gotta light. It seems infinitesimally small. But it’s something. But it’s something. But you gotta give the kid credit…
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LES BOUGIES N’A JAMAIS FONDU AUSSI LUMINEUX
je suis tombé dedans sans bruit/ pas même le vent/ c’était tellement instantané/ c’était comme si on me cherchait dehors/ je ne le recherchais pas/ une autre personne me suffisait toujours/ plus qu’assez/ beaucoup plus qu’assez/ c’était ma curiosité d’être dans un trio qui était une violation de plus de…
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Mon Incapacité à se Propager
je boirais du vin rouge de ton trou comme du sang vous avez été cassé ciel et colline votre enfance de la bouche et tout le monde chante à leur horreur ils sont tous seuls ils sont tout seul
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Blood and Money
you were always leaving not in an angry tone but in no tone at all and then you’d be back and crawling into bed most of my kind were awkward in our peasant hostility you were with the boys with money it all came so easily for you knowing as…
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U Know What I Mean U Know What I Mean
you burned holes where my eyes had been the nagual doesn’t have to be the desert we had it in our hands not knowing anyone could fall down that vortex and the gravity of the thing could easily crush diamonds into the sound of a piano i was the guy…
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i know who u r
i know your kindness i know/ your scars i have some of those 2/ i know where you’ve been/ i know the smell of your shit/ i know your guts, and/ i know/ when you are giving up i do not want you 2 give up but it’s not up…
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Winter’s Grip
it was SoLongAgoItWasYesterday it was crawling under your blankets to be with U2 smell the death sweat FangedLikeASnake whispering some bewildered we were all bewildered whispers of indifferent affectation whispering that 1day in WintersGripWas all we really ever had/
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SWIMMING TO THE OTHER SIDE: I THINK SHE KNOWS
Arriving here, I must meet the dead. The boys I knew at that time had all lost their lives in Vietnam. The ones who survived as maimed and crippled had lost their lives as well. Many simply blew their brains out. When they fully realized what had become of them,…
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год еды дерьма
твоя дыра всегда закрыт 2 мир 2 меня я был вынужден 2 открой его с моим языком 2 выпить тебя глубоко 2 жевать наследие экскременты кто то хныкал
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Car Thief
For Robb Nagle VIDEO: KEVIN WAS A CAR THIEF So. Exactly. Who. The. Fuck. Do. U. Think. I. Would. Know. Junkies. Drug Dealers. Card counters. (I love Card Counters because they screw around with casinos). Car thieves. Kevin was a car thief. “Wanna go for a ride.” I was always…
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Your Many Holes
out of all the various holes you have constructed for the rest of us to fall into like juices spilling savage secrets old scratch make your very own wounds again malicious little pet disengaged from the rest of us intractable among the rugged charybdis not made from water but from…
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As If Suspended From Above
knowing you, loving you was to suspend all belief in apprehension you could tame the rest of me in the hanging of you above the bed whispering of slow ruin in the wandering your books of yet another star undone that used to hang there in the southern sky before…
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The Self-Sexualized Male Animal
Here’s what I know. I know this is not you. This is not even any of your second selves. I go along with the charade a lot. Especially when it’s all around me 24/7, and I am only one person. But I am not Audrey Hepburn, and I sure as…
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Everyone Up
this time you would demand he remain accountable to us the people who loved him who had saved his candy ass how many times and of course he was accountable to no one again and we just ate his candy ass as if it was nectar from the gods of…
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sleeping on the floor
there is a cement brick embedded in my back we often sleep in empty rooms where we have slept before the sunlight slipping in like dust is an old story to the likes of us no furniture no computers just our phones no future no dreams no relief from sleeping…