His Fundamental Conflict
We infantilize children into stereotypes that are expectations around what they can do and cannot be permited to do, behaviorally in concert with the stereotype’s stereotype. Boys love sports. Women like to cook.
Education itself is a stereotype. Some boys might not like sports. Some girls might not be eager to learn how to manage a kitchen.
The kid can have multiple dimensions imbued into the context of one personality. That has several voices depending on which one the kid wants to use. He can use one. He can use the other. Or he can use both. The fact that you might be averse to speaking his language is not his fault. Adolescents are not pegs you can hang your baggage on.
The first two voices I know about this child is one that articulates he’s cute but busted. The other voice, the darker voice, says: You cannot know me unless you take the risk of attempting to know me.
Chances are, you will be unable to know him.
Unless. Time and risk. Which can be the same thing in the moments of his picking. He will test you. Because he is compelled to in the event you will stand with him when he needs you and he will.