Tim Barrus: The New York Times
I teach adolescent boys with HIV. The Hard To Reach. Many of the boys have done sex work. They all come from extraordinary poverty, impoverished and struggling school districts, the guilt and remorse prostitution engenders, and the debilitating stigma HIV itself promotes. Where in this is there any hope. Suicide is yet another group epidemic. We do very little for these young men.
I stand amazed at how little they know about sex. What they know is what gets shared among themselves. And what they know is a combination of superstition (such as virgins can’t get HIV) and sheer ignorance (like oral sex isn’t sex). Or, you can always tell if someone is infected because they look bad. It goes on-and-on.
I have to begin at ground zero.
Reality kicks in when we discuss relationships and feelings. Crushing on straight boys is a big topic. They are not all from the GBLT Community. You don’t have to be gay to do sex work. Addiction is ubiquitous. All of them have had other sexually transmitted diseases. They think consent is getting paid to perform acts they find humiliating. They do not think they get involved with sadomasochism when, in fact, they play victim consistently.
They are exploited, abused, molested, destroyed, objectified, vilified, stereotyped, hated, and thrown away. Most begin this life at 12.
It leaves me with an awareness of what this culture actually is, and that is a sentiment I share with each and every one of them. It is about education or the lack of it.